Thursday, November 16, 2006

Are You Prepared For World War Three?

When that defining moment finally comes, will you
have the time to remember what you could have done to stop it?

Let's pretend, just for the moment, that this is a hypothetical

Let's pretend, just for argument's sake, in the comfort of your
own easy chair, in front of your own big screen TV, just a few
easy steps away from your favorite, anxiety-reducing snacks in
your refrigerator, that this is just an academic exercise in
geopolitical and psychological speculation, a polite
brainstorming session that imaginary participants might conduct
if certain coincidental worst case scenarios were to come to pass
... all at the same time.

And let us acknowledge, in the calm certainty of our own
typically secure routines, that any resemblance of this imaginary
debate to actual persons and events living or dead may not be
purely coincidental.

OK? Got it? Pretend it's hypothetical. Just for fun. Then let's

Are you ready for World War Three?

What kind of pathetic paranoid poppycock is that? What IS this?
Y2K drill? Much ado about nothing, I think.

Remember. You're pretending it's hypothetical. You agreed.

Oh, all right. Let's see. Mmmmmm .... of course I'm not ready.
Nobody is ready for World War Three. You CAN'T get ready for

What will you do when it happens?

Sit here and be vaporized, I guess. What could anybody do?

So ... does that mean you're not ready?

Of course I'm not ready for World War Three! Is anybody ready
for World War Three?

Yes, I think there are some people who are ready?
Oh yeah? Who?

Well, three types of groups, at least. First, there are the people
who are already victims of major wars, the people in Palestine,
Iraq, Afghanistan, Serbia, Colombia, not to mention Burma, the
Philippines, Sudan, Zimbabwe, Congo, and certain other
countries, people who are already scavenging in often radioactive
garbage dumps just to make ends meet; many of their
relatives or children have already been killed by invaders, and
they're just living hand to mouth, not caring whether the food
they eat or the things they find might be radioactive or not,
because when your expected life span is only a few more weeks
or months, you don't much care about those things. Survival
becomes a day-by-day operation. If the superpowers who have
these weapons destroy themselves by using them, that would be
good news for the folks routinely diving in dumpsters.

Second, there are the people who plan and wish to execute
nuclear wars.

They have already built themselves secure bunkers miles beneath
the earth's surface. There are many in the U.S. and Europe. The
figure they can ride it out, and they have a new, secret technology
that actually detoxifies radioactive contamination, but
they're keeping it under wraps until after the
Big One so then they can come out when the coast is clear and
continue making scads of money doing two things: cleaning up
radioactive rubble and repossessing real estate whose owners
have been obliterated, are slowly and agonizingly died of
radiation poisoning, or simply have scampered off to more
hospitable climes.

Third.... to be continued in the next post